Monday, 26. February 2007
Forgiveness: A Path To Healing
© by Gilbert Williams
What Is Self-forgiveness?
Self-forgiveness is the willingness to believe that you are worthy, that there are no mistakes rather, you are on the planet, or in Earth School (as some people call it) to learn about being human. The opportunities to learn are just that - not mistakes - just opportunities to learn.
Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia talked about how he always took the elevator to the wrong floor whenever he stayed in a hotel. He would scold himself repeatedly but invariably would get out on the wrong floor the next time he stayed in a hotel. He decided that scolding himself was obviously not working so instead decided to say to himself, as he patted himself on the shoulder, "You sweet old thing, you did it again." It does not matter. In other words don't sweat the small stuff and it is ALL SMALL STUFF.
Where did we get the idea that we were supposed to be perfect? If we were, we wouldn't be here. We are because the purpose in being here is to learn the lessons - and the first lesson in our growth to becoming all that we can be is to love and accept ourselves exactly as we are, to develop self-appreciation. One of the most important aspects of learning about love of self is the notion that behaviour changes when we think of ourselves as terrific instead of not good enough.
It is the same principle to use when we want children to behave in appropriate ways. What you stroke, is what you get. In other words, what you pay attention to expands. A child who misbehaves and gets attention will continue to misbehave. A similar reaction occurs with everyone because as we are criticised we become frightened. The more afraid we are, the more we do the very things for which we are criticised. This is called a 'self-fulfilling prophecy' or the 'Pygmalion Effect.'
For Practical Steps to Self-forgiveness:
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